More Glorious and Bright: Content never

Every hour I'm on a mission is another hour I believe less in coincidence. I have had too many happenstance experiences for them to be happenstance anymore! Take just one hour ago. My companion and I had forgotten our key to get into our room (no one will believe me but this is the first time that had happened) so we went to the front desk to get a spare. We were in our P-Day sweats, and to go to the front desk you're supposed to be in a skirt up there, but obviously we couldn't get into our room to change, so off we went. Of course, the terrifying (adult leader), was right there so we had to pull some secret agent moves so she wouldn't see us. Every time I've spoken with her I've really enjoyed her, but she is still really scary; it always looks like she's looking at you during devotionals, and she is hard and fast about the rules. But we managed to slip past her, sweats and all, and get to the front desk. Then I heard someone call my name. It was my friend from seminary who had moved to Utah, Tate Chester. She was there at the MTC for a test program - not as a full-time missionary yet - and she was only there for a little bit. If we hadn't forgotten our keys we would have missed her! It was crazy awesome.

Just a little earlier in the temple I kept looking out for someone I knew in the sessions coming in and out. I didn't see anyone and was kind of sad about it. Then crossing the street back to the MTC I saw my friend crossing the opposite side and got to say hi to him too! Between seeing him and seeing Tate I.know that God is not going to leave me alone. I haven't been feeling especially so, but in Korea I know there will be times when I feel that way. It feels like His way of promising me that He will always be there for me.

Another cool thing that happened was the devotional Sunday. I don't know if it was coincidence or if they arranged it this way. But I got to sing for the devotional! It was an amazing experience; it all came together really smoothly. I found an incredible violinist and pianist, and we performed This is the Christ. The violinist is headed to Korea too. The devotional was completely focused on our branch. The group who just left had a district of only sisters -- we miss them so much, they were amazing! They taught and witnessed the conversion of a native Korean through TRC (a teaching method) and got to attend her baptism as missionaries at the MTC! It's definitely a rare thing to do. They hadn't even left the MTC before they taught someone who believed so much they wanted to join the church! We got to watch a video, and the districts who had left were in it. We also got to hear from Iris (the new Korean convert) who we've taught before in TRC. Her testimony was absolutely beautiful. Even for someone who's still feeling the greenie fire, her testimony is exceptionally strong! It was really Korea's time to shine.

Earlier that day Sunday I was feeling a little stressed. Stressed is too strong of a word; I had confidence everything would turn out, but the day before had been pretty rough and I was trying to prepare for singing at the devotional and also accompanying for a sacrament musical number. I finally found time for the elders performing in sacrament and I to practice, but I had to miss Music and the Spoken Word and Relief Society to do so, which I was pretty sad about. I love being a part of that stuff, and MATSW centers me really well. But we found an empty chapel to practice in. On the computer screens was MATSW, which was pretty cool that we still got to watch it. But the first face I saw on screen was my friend Jordan's! BYU Singers had gone to sing in the performance. I knew almost everyone whose faces were onscreen. Again, God's way of reminding me that he is conscious of me and my needs and that everything will turn out okay.

TRC this week was a little different. We're doing Skype lessons now and that's pretty hard. The girl we were teaching made a swiping motion and kept saying Nephi, so I thought she was talking about Nephi killing Laban. She was not. She was thoroughly not. She was talking about Nephi forgiving his brothers. We lost our scripture references so we had to spend time finding the scripture in English, then in Korean. But somehow, we really connected with her. We had taught about forgiveness. It seemed like a random topic to choose but we both felt really strongly about it. She started crying. The Spirit was really strong; it was a message that for whatever reason she really needed to hear, even with our clumsy Korean.This next quote I said my companion wrote down; she says it's one of her favorite things I"ve ever said. "I'm going to be honest, I'm not sure if her tears were because of the Spirit or because we were butchering her language."

Really though, we've had a good run of lessons. We got one 'investigator' to keep the Word of Wisdom, (LDS health code) which was really hard for her, and our especially difficult investigator is considering baptism. They haven't been easy on us. One companionship in another district got dropped. One investigator decided she didn't want to be baptized because she didn't feel the Spirit during one of their lessons. Korea is going to be even harder, I know!

The devotional Tuesday left me with some interesting thoughts.

1. Content never, happy always. Especially relevant to missionaries.

2. When you love the people more than yourself, you will be happy.

3. Enjoy the journey.

1 week away from Korean and the stress is extreme for almost everyone. None of us are exactly fluent! The MTC is like a safe little bubble where we can make mistakes. In Korea we teach real children of God. I'm excited beyond words but also pretty nervous. Today in the temple, I opened randomly to D&C 6:20-24:

20 Behold,... I have spoken unto thee because of thy desires; therefore treasure up these words in thy heart. Be faithful and diligent in keeping the commandments of God, and I will encircle thee in the arms of my love.

21 Behold, I am Jesus Christ, the Son of God. I am the same that came unto mine own, and mine own received me not. I am the light which shineth in darkness, and the darkness comprehendeth it not.

22 Verily, verily, I say unto you, if you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things.

23 Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God?

24 And now, behold, you have received a witness; for if I have told you things which no man knoweth have you not received a witness?

The Lord is speaking words of comfort and encouragement. I understood that I am doing good, that I am doing enough, and that I can continue to grow and do even better. As a missionary my thoughts are always "What more can I do?" or when I'm stressed "I'm not doing enough!" This week it's been important to stop and realize what I've accomplished instead of what I haven't. Korean is hard. Teaching is hard. But I am encircled in the arms of His love, and through Him I can do all things!

xoxo

Sister Bell